Saturday morning I was lying in bed, drinking black coffee and reading movie reviews in the Wall Street Journal Weekend Edition, when I had an epiphany…
I used to love going to movies. My wife and I, before we were married and thereafter, went to the movies all the time. If an “important” movie was coming out, I had to see it shortly after it opened. It was a necessary thing, something to keep up culturally, but also because it was interesting, entertaining, stimulating.
Once the kids came along – well, kids. You know. We rarely went to the movies. Too much hassle, and we had other interests, ones who liked to build block towers and refused to sit still.
In the midst of all this, videos and DVDs became a major channel. The advantages to watching a movie at home are obvious. No tall person sits down in front of you as the opening credits roll. If you want to get something to drink, you hit the pause button and go to the kitchen. And you’re not drinking overpriced sodas, either. You can have a glass of wine or beer, if you want, and in a glass. Like Vincent says to Jules in “Pulp Fiction:”
Well, in Amsterdam, you can buy
beer in a movie theatre. And I
don't mean in a paper cup either.
They give you a glass of beer, like
in a bar. In Paris, you can buy
beer at MacDonald's. Also, you
know what they call a Quarter
Pounder with Cheese in Paris?
About the time it became easier to rent movies that go to the theater, digital effects got to be really great – and proceeded to destroy movies, at least in the short run. What I mean is this: Once the focus switched to spectacular digital monsters and incredible (fake) explosions and disasters, movies got to be a lot more dull.
These days, there are a few movies that come out with interesting plots, good dialog and masterful characterization, but mostly it’s just stuff blowing up.
So – this is my epiphany – I now find it a lot more entertaining to read about movies than see them. If I read a great review that makes me really want to see a movie, I will. Otherwise, reading about it is good enough. Movie-viewing by proxy.
MAKE MINE A ROYALE WITH CHEESE.
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